Sunday, March 30, 2008

Dear Spoiled Mother of Four,

I don't want to work for you anymore.  I don't like the environment in your home, I don't like the way I'm expected to be the maid, I don't like being bossed around by seven-year-olds, and I don't particularly like the food you make.  I think I'd rather work a 9-5 sitting behind a desk, bored to tears, wanting to rip my eyeballs out from looking at a computer screen for so long, and getting home for dinner on time.  

I used to like you, or so I thought.  Then I discovered that I'd rather not be treated like a maid and a nanny all rolled into one.  You don't pay me enough for that.  Would you like to make it $20/hour? Then I might be on board. 

I've begun applying for jobs at pre-schools in the area.  I think I have a shot, and my dad asked me to get a job where I could smile.  I think there's something to that.  

Please don't be offended, Spoiled Mother of Four, it's nothing personal, I just don't like you anymore.


Saturday, March 22, 2008

Dear Basement,

I'm not happy with the way you've been behaving lately.  The truth is, some places would be glad to see seven inches of rain...and maybe you were, but you certainly didn't show it well.  It was highly inconsiderate of you to leak in every single room.  If I did that, people would not be happy with me!  

Thanks for helping us see that we have way too much junk.  I guess we needed that.  Maybe we could have a garage sale, get rid of all the crap.  

You've been so kind to me for so long, I guess I couldn't expect ten years without so much as a drip.  I've been fiercely angry with you for the last couple of days, but now, I think I'm coming around...don't be mad when I put my carpet back in, and try to set up a's just that Ethan and me BOTH sleeping in the living room is terribly tragic.  His alarm DOES go off 5 times in the morning.  As in there are 5 DIFFERENT alarms.  Yeah.  So I haven't had a whole night's sleep.  I guess what I'm saying is, I miss you, Basement, the way that you were.  


Saturday, March 15, 2008

Dear Fairfield,

I'm home.  Did I neglect to mention that before?  Well, I am.  And I really REALLY have taken up blogging, because I'm attending the family ward here, and it seems that that's the way to be cool in the ward.   I'm aware that I'm 21 and not married.  Do you think this is going to stop me? NO! You see, I'm doing what's the best thing for me right now, but I'd really like to have some friends here. I've never been in a family ward Relief Society before.  

I've also noticed, dear Fairfield, that you've hardly changed.  When I got back, I almost instantly felt that I was in high school again.  Am I sad about that?  No...I still love you just as much as I always have...most of the time.  The thing I'm concerned about though, is that your drama hasn't changed either.  I'm fortunate enough to have a brother, you may have met him...he's been around for 18 years... and so I get to hear the drama that comes from the hallowed walls of FHS.  Well, the thing is...the drama included, it feels more like home than ever before.  

Now there's something I've been meaning to talk to you about.  This weather just isn't working for me.  I understand that you're trying your best to make everyone happy, but the truth is, I think you're going a little overboard to please those on the extremes...I mean blizzard? Honestly.  That was uncalled for.  Thanks for balancing it out with days of rain.  I appreciate that more than you know.  Could we please see the sun? Please?
Well, if you could arrange it, I'm sure I wouldn't mind.  Thanks for being consistent and comfortable.  I've missed you, and I'm glad to be back.

Thank you Fairfield, for being you.


Monday, March 10, 2008

100 things about me.

1. I try to pretend I don't like writing in a Blog.
2. I have three blogs.
3. I don't write in my regular journal as much as I wish I did.
4. Sometimes I don't feel like the things that are going on in my life are important enough to write down.
5. Sometimes I realize that the most important things that have ever happened in my life are happening right now.
6. I love my life.
7. That doesn't mean it's easy.
8. I have a love/hate relationship with my job.
9. I'm a nanny...and have been for the last few years.
10. The first time I took a nanny job, my dad was really mad at me.
11. He bragged about that same job to a neighbor 2 days ago.
12. 2 days ago was the first time I ever remember being in a blizzard warning.
13. I used to love snow more than anything.
14. Now I can't wait for Summer.
15. I used to hate Summer.
16. Then I lost 65 lbs.
17. Now I don't feel like the fattest girl at the pool.
18. Now I love the pool.
19. So I love the Summer.
20. I can't wait to get a new bathing suit.
21. I need to get in shape...Spring is still coming, even though we got a foot of snow...
22. I hate dieting.
23. I love losing weight.
24. I always feel bad about myself when I notice that I'm gaining weight.
25. I have a hard time getting motivated to do things sometimes.
26. My room is a wreck, but I still haven't cleaned it.
27. I have more clothes than any person should have.
28. I don't wear most of them.
29. I also have more shoes than I should.
30. I love shoes.
31. I never feel fat while buying shoes.
32. I used to be afraid to wear heels because I felt like a monster.
33. Now I don't feel like a monster.
34. Sometimes I actually feel beautiful.
35. Mostly when my hair is straight.
36. My hair is naturally curly.
37. Sometimes I love my curls, but I feel like people don't take me seriously if my hair is curly.
38. Maybe because I look like Curly Sue.
39. I had a girl scout leader named Sue.
40. I was a girl scout for years, but never sold cookies by myself.
41. I did sell cookies outside a bank with my troop members.
42. Very few girls I've been friends with since before middle school were outside of the GS troop.
43. I always wish I hadn't quit girl scouts when I did.
44. There are lots of things I wish I'd never quit.
45. I quit dance after years.
46. I also quit piano.
47. I am a little talented at a lot of things.
48. I've always wished I was very talented at something.
49. The only thing I've found is loving children.
50. I can't wait to have kids of my own.
51. I'm terrified of growing up.
52. I don't want to be treated like a child.
53. I moved back into my parents' house.
54. Sometimes I feel like I child
55. Sometimes I act like a child.
56. and sometimes...I like it.
57. I have a boyfriend.
58. He acts like a child with me.
59. That's the most fun part of our relationship.
60. We went to elementary school together.
61. We went back to said elementary school, and he pushed me on the swings.
62. With him, I feel like the luckiest girl in the world.
63. And I believe that I really am.
64. I'm also lucky to have such a great family.
65. Sometimes I forget to look at my parents as real people.
66. When I realize they are, I love them even more than before.
67. My sister has always been a mom to me.
68. I don't thank her enough for that.
69. I trust her more than any other girl in the world.
70. I secretly think that most babies are ugly when they're born.
71. Not my nieces.
72. I rarely get enough sleep.
73. This is not because I have important things to be doing.
74. Some of the best conversations in my life have happened at 4 AM.
75. I wouldn't trade my "conversations" for the world.
76. I love talking to people.
77. Sometimes I consider this a talent.
78. Sometimes I don't think I have any talents at all.
79. ...and I wish I wasn't insecure.
80. I am insecure.
81. I used to get made fun of.
82. That doesn't happen anymore.
83. At least not that I know of.
84. People started treating me differently when I lost weight.
85. I noticed it.
86. I liked it for a while.
87. Then I wasn't sure if anyone knew who I really was.
88. Then I wasn't sure if I really knew who I was.
89. I didn't start trying to figure out what it meant to be me until college.
90. I am currently a college drop-out.
91. I'm not embarrassed about that.
92. I hate sitting in classrooms.
93. I've always wanted to do hair.
94. But I've always wanted to change the world.
95. I haven't figured out how to.
96. I have a passion for American Sign Language.
97. This has not helped me accomplish anything worthwhile.
98. I'm proud of myself.
99. Sometimes I feel like I'm really weak.
100. But the thing is... I feel strong.