Wednesday, January 16, 2008


The worst feeling in the whole wide world is to feel useless. Like nothing you could do would make a difference.

When someone you love works for years trying to achieve something, and then doesn't...and they're hurting, and you're frustrated...because you're useless.

When you're miles away from someone that you want to be able to console...and you can't. You're useless.

It's terrifying sometimes living more than a thousand miles away from all of the people that mean the most to me in my life. The distance makes it so difficult to feel helpful or worthwhile sometimes. Once again, useless.

...and then I find myself wondering what I'm really doing with my life. What are my goals? What am I becoming? Well, I'm not really once again, I feel useless. Awesome.

The truth is, I'm tired. I'm burnt out. I don't like Build-a-bear anymore, as a manager I barely get to play with the kids. I have two wisdom teeth coming in, and not only do they hurt in my mouth, but I constantly have a headache. I have no idea what I'm doing...and I just need a hug. Awesome.


Mama D said...

Cyber hugs coming your way!!!
[[ <3 ]]

It stinks to realize you can't always solve "the world's" problems or even just be there to give someone you love a hug as they struggle through something.

I know it sounds trite, but you aren't completely useless! Hang in there.

(Sorry, Sarah, to steal your comment first status again!)

carrie said...

you are never useless adrienne. your love and support can be given wherever you are and let's not forget the power of prayer!

today we have so many more ways to communicate with people and maybe it's not the same as being there, but i remember the first time i moved away from home and got sick, really sick, and wanted my mother so much. i was over a thousand miles away but i called her and it was great to just hear her voice and to hear her say she loved me. it gave me the strength to get through a very difficult time.

when someone really needs help, there is no greater than the blessings you can ask of from our Heavenly Father on behalf of anyone you love who needs them. i don't have to convince you of how He knows us, loves us, and can take care of us best.

so sounds like adrienne is ready for a change. you've learned some new things about yourself, what you want, what you don't want. it's all part of a long process. so just keep your eyes, ears, and heart open for new opportunities...they're sure to come!