Look what I made! :)

Create your own family sticker graphic at pYzam.com

The truth is...

I'm going to be honest.

I'm not going to keep pretending like life is perfect right now, because it isn't.

I'm stressed.

I've been sick for over a month.

I've been in and out of the doctor, with lots of needles put in my arms.

I quit my job.

I feel like I'm letting people down.

I need a new job.




So that's where it all begins. It's been a hard little while for me. Don't get me wrong, I have lots of blessings...but there comes a point where I really am just tired of keeping up my facade everywhere. So I'm letting it down for a moment. I'm STRESSED. Even angry sometimes. More than once, I have wanted to throw things, scream, or just curl up and cry.

I know everyone's lives are hard from time to time, but what consolation is that when all I have energy to think about right now is how I'm going to get out of this predicament?

Anyway...if you have heard of any job openings, I would love to hear about them.


(I will be working part-time at Build-a-bear in Kenwood.)

The "Joke" known as Provo Parking Enforcement

I wrote this some time ago for my Freshman English class that I took Junior year of college. I enjoyed re-reading it...and if you've ever gotten a parking boot, you might too.

Let me know if you've heard this one. A blond, a brunette, and a redhead are all in a car. They park it in the lot of a friend's building as they quickly run in to borrow an Epi-pen so that they can save the life of a poor child who's been stung by a bee several blocks away. Upon returning to their car, no less than two minutes from parking it there, they find an ominous parking boot attached like a tumor on the wheel of the car. An hour later, a University Parking Enforcement employee moves more slowly than grass grows to remove the boot, charge an arbitrary fee, and shoot them a dirty look for inconveniencing him by having him come remove the boot. Luckily someone dialed 911, and the life of the child was saved, but wouldn't it have been better if the girls had been able to return quickly with the Epi-pen? Not only were the blond, the brunette, and the redhead inconvenienced by being booted, but they were treated unkindly by the person who placed the boot in the first place. Why does this occur so frequently in Provo? Why booting? I feel that University Parking Enforcement employees place boots on cars and treat people unkindly because they believe in cruel and unusual punishment, they dislike their jobs, and they feel no charity towards their fellow students.

How can I make such a claim, you may ask, as to suggest that the employees favor cruel and unusual punishment? Simply defined, cruel and unusual punishment is any punishment that is inhumane or violates basic human dignity. What part of placing a giant, and by no means inconspicuous, metal boot on my car that renders it immobile does not violate basic human dignity? Everyone can see the boot. This is distressing, and uncomfortable. But despite the discomfort of the parking boot, it also is a violation of basic property rights. I spent eleven thousand dollars on my car. What makes it all right for any individual to immobilize my vehicle? What laws govern these parking lots? How can anyone be wholly aware of the restrictions on any particular parking lot? I suggest that there's no way to know which arbitrary rules are going to be enforced, not to mention how or when said enforcement will occur. The parking lot at my building has posted signs stating that people who park there without the proper stickers will be booted or towed. When I called University Parking Enforcement on the Fourth of July to ask them to boot or tow people from the lot, they informed me that they weren't going to be booting or towing that day. What use is this company if they aren't even going to protect the residents? Who gave the "booters" supreme authority over certain parking spaces? These are all questions that I have been unable to find the answers to.

Among other things, I find it cruel and unusual to use extortion tactics on anyone. If a booter can place and remove a boot in half an hour, then the company earns a whopping one hundred dollars an hour. Is it worth it? BYU uses green parking tickets that cost twenty dollars, and do not render the vehicle immobile, and they are effective. Most students can barely afford to pay the BYU parking ticket, and the University Parking Enforcement boot is more than twice the cost. Let me play out a scenario for you. What if I leave my apartment to go to work, and find a parking boot on my car? Let's say it takes the company forty-five minutes to arrive there, and then fifteen minutes to remove the boot. This means that I have lost not only fifty dollars that I can never get back, but I have also lost an hour of work, which means that hour's wages, and am no longer in good graces with my employer. It seems to me that University Parking Enforcement is destroying our liberty one boot at a time.

Now when someone does something as cruel as booting, they are not likely to feel good about themselves. This snowballs into a dangerous situation that ends in transferrence of anger to those who have been booted. When a car is booted, a paper is placed on their window that says something along the lines of, "Warning: You've been booted." This paper is attatched with tape. When a friend of mine discovered a boot on her car, she pulled the piece of paper off of the window, and found that the tape wouldn't come off. Just as the booter was leaving, we sent another friend of ours to ask the booter to remove the tape from the window; he promptly began cursing at our friend, and suggesting that they fight. All we wanted was for the tape to be removed from the window. Our friend gave up the fight, not wanting it to come to blows, and as he walked away, behind the booter's car, the booter put his car in reverse, and sped towards my friend. Realizing what he'd done just before hitting my friend, he put the car in drive and sped away. This leads us to another problem with University Parking Enforcement. Obviously the employees have an unresolved anger issue they need to work out: they hate their jobs, and as a result, are lashing out at unsuspecting extorted individuals. In our society, it's easy to suggest that we "kill them with kindness," a very simple strategy that would involve me keeping a fresh homemade batch of cookies in my car, and leaving them on the hood whenever I think there's a chance of being booted. This strategy, would be effective, and I suggest that as I begin to do this, you all follow suit. Now I'm not saying that they deserve homemade cookies for their cruelty, but sometimes there's no choice other than to be the bigger person.

This booting process is contrary to gospel principles. We live in a community that is predominantly LDS, and as a result, should be able to expect to be treated in ways that can peacefully coexist with gospel living. We are not a church that believes in public embarrassment, in taking money from the poor, or in lashing out in anger at those around us. These are all things that occur as a result of booting, not to mention provoking our neighbors to anger. What they do as a company is not only unfair, unjust, and frustrating, it's just plain wrong. There's not a person who deserves to have the pain of booting. What University Parking Enforcement needs is a lot more charity. I understand that charity is not a profitable business, and that they would have to make their livelihood somewhere else, but the rewards can be seen on all sides. The citizens of Provo would be happier, the booters would be happier because they'd be doing what was right, and as a result, the booters and civilians could live in harmony.

I do suggest that we are victims of cruelty. It is nearly impossible to describe the injustice of booting, but if you've ever found your car with a parking boot on it, you will understand. You'll understand the sinking feeling you get when you discover the boot, the fire that emerges as you realize the cost of the boot, and lastly, the enduring bad mood that generally follows any booting experience. The knowledge that you've just lost all of the money that it takes to buy groceries for two weeks. Two weeks! "It's all right," you'll tell yourself, "I was trying to lose weight anyway." This fallacy will keep us thinking that it's really our fault, and that we deserved the boot. This battered wife syndrome allows the booters power that they don't deserve, and abuses the common man. No number of tears is going to end the parking tyrrany. It's time for action. Write the local government. And, if we all park in only unmarked parking spaces for just one month, University Parking enforcement will lose hundreds of dollars.

So our joke was missing a punch line. What ever happened to the blonde, the brunette and the redhead? Well, they contested the boot, and received no reimbursement after a long and miserable month of trying to get the money back. Not very funny, is it? That's because parking enforcement isn't a joke. It's a pain.

Dear world:

Just in case you didn't hear it yet, I thought I would let you know very officially that I will only be an Unklesbay for 317 more days!


That's right.

I, Adrienne Unklesbay, am getting


MARRIED!




Christopher proposed to me on July 3, and we have set our wedding date for May 29, 2009. :) Look forward to the forthcoming details.

Love,

Adrienne

Master, the Tempest is Raging...

Imagine that you are in a boat out in the open sea. A sudden storm arises, the boat fills with water, the waves are tossing the boat, and you are terrified that you will be thrown into the depths of the sea, and find yourself in a watery grave before morning. Jesus' disciples found themselves in this exact predicament, and it is recorded in Mark 4. We read:

37 And there arose a great storm of wind, and the waves beat into the ship, so that it was now full. 
  38 And he was in the hinder part of the ship, asleep on a pillow: and they awake him, and say unto him, Master, carest thou not that we perish? 
  39 And he arose, and rebuked the wind, and said unto the sea, Peace, be still. And the wind ceased, and there was a great calm. 
  40 And he said unto them, Why are ye so fearful? how is it that ye have no faith? 

I don't imagine that in most of our lifetimes we will find ourselves in a literal boat with the Savior, begging him to awake and to calm the storm, but I'd be willing to bet that most, if not all of us, can see the parallels between this and our own lives.

Let me share with you a story that Howard W. Hunter shared it in the October 1984 general conference. 
"Mary Ann Baker's beloved and only brother suffered from the same respiratory disease that had taken their parents’ lives, and he left their home in Chicago to find a warmer climate in the southern part of the United States. 
For a time he seemed to be improving, but then a sudden turn in his health came and he died almost immediately. Mary Ann and her sister were heartbroken. It only added to their deep grief that neither their own health nor their personal finances allowed them to claim their brother’s body or to finance its return to Chicago for burial. 
The Baker family had been raised as faithful Christians, but Mary’s trust in a loving God broke under the strain of her brother’s death and her own diminished circumstances. “God does not care for me or mine,” said Mary Ann. “This particular manifestation of what they call ‘divine providence’ is unworthy of a God of love.” ...
“I have always tried to believe on Christ and give the Master a consecrated life,” she said, “but this is more than I can bear. What have I done to deserve this? What have I left undone that God should wreak His vengeance upon me in this way?”

“Carest thou not that we perish?” was the cry of Mary Ann Baker. This comes from each of us at one time or another, as feebly we find ourselves on our knees calling out to the Lord in our own way. We experience the pains of life, disappointments, failures, struggles and stresses, death and sorrow, and at times find ourselves feeling completely alone, and sometimes feeling that even the Lord has turned away, and would not care if we were to meet our destruction. When we feel this way, it is helpful to turn to the words of the Savior, “In the world ye shall have tribulation: but be of good cheer; I have overcome the world.” 

The Savior asked his disciples, “How is it that ye have no faith?” We might ask ourselves the same question. 

Howard W. Hunter said:

None of us would like to think we have no faith, but I suppose the Lord’s gentle rebuke here is largely deserved. This great Jehovah, in whom we say we trust and whose name we have taken upon us, is he who said, “Let there be a firmament in the midst of the waters, and let it divide the waters from the waters.” (Gen. 1:6.) And he is also the one who said, “Let the waters under the heaven be gathered together unto one place, and let the dry land appear.” (Gen. 1:9.) Furthermore, it was he who parted the Red Sea, allowing the Israelites to pass through on dry ground. (See Ex. 14:21–22.) Certainly it should be no surprise that he could command a few elements acting up on the Sea of Galilee. And our faith should remind us that he can calm the troubled waters of our lives."

Easier said than done, right? Probably. For all of us, the days of darkness are very real. The threat of destruction is tangible, and we need to learn to trust in the Lord as He has taken our pains upon Himself. 
Alma 7:11-12 reads:

11 And he shall go forth, suffering pains and afflictions and temptations of every kind; and this that the word might be fulfilled which saith he will take upon him the pains and the sicknesses of his people. 
  12 And he will take upon him death, that he may loose the bands of death which bind his people; and he will take upon him their infirmities, that his bowels may be filled with mercy, according to the flesh, that he may know according to the flesh how to succor his people according to their infirmities.

How wonderful it is to know that Christ was willing to suffer these pains for each of us! As we learn to recognize that Christ has done these things so as to help us as we struggle, we will begin to feel the storms of life dispersing, and the seas will begin to be still. 

I have struggled throughout my life with migraine headaches. These headaches often leave me unable to function, as they affect my vision and my balance among other things. Often the headaches progress to a point where I feel like I can bear no more. One night, my headache met up with its emotional equal, and not only was I feeling pain and dizziness, but also loneliness and inadequacy. I didn't know what to do, or where to turn. I spent a good amount of time kneeling in prayer, pleading and sobbing that the Lord would not leave me alone, and my phone rang. A dear friend on the other side of the country suggested that if I felt it would profit me, I should ask for a blessing. I agreed that this would be a good idea. A priesthood holder from my ward came over, and before the blessing, asked me to tell him a little bit about what was going on. I told him that I'd been struggling with migraines, and that I needed a blessing. I didn't mention the other struggles, mostly because of pride. As part of the blessing, I was assured that I was not alone, and all of my concerns were addressed as if they had been presented to the Lord in list form. The pain in my head did not subside, but the anguish of spirit ceased, and I slept for the first time in days. That night, I understood the power in the Savior's words, “Peace, be still,” because I felt the stillness within myself. 

Remember Mary Ann Baker? The storms in her life began to subside as well, and as her immortal testimony, she wrote these words, 


Master, the terror is over. 
The elements sweetly rest. 
Earth’s sun in the calm lake is mirrored, 
And heaven’s within my breast. 
Linger, Oh, blessed Redeemer! 
Leave me alone no more, 
And with joy I shall make the blest harbor 
And rest on the blissful shore. 
The winds and the waves shall obey my will; 
Peace, be still! Peace, be still! 
I add my testimony to that of Mary Ann. I know that the Lord can calm the stormy seas in our lives. I have seen it happen. I know that God lives, and that He loves each and every one of us.

Dear Saturday,

Dear General Conference,

Once again, you have changed my life. Everything feels more peaceful and calm, and I once again remember that everything is okay.  Thank you for everything you are, for being broadcast in my own home, and for coming on such a beautiful weekend.  I hope you didn't mind that we spent the two hour break away from you...lounging on a blanket at the park.  We were just hoping to soak it all in.  The weather, the Spirit, the wonderful things that we have.  What a blessing. :)  

I know you'd like to think that it's just you, but the thing is....everything else included, I am feeling like the luckiest and happiest girl in the whole wide world.  As always, one of my favorite times of the year.  Thank you.

Love,

Adrienne

PS.  In case you haven't met him yet, this is that guy I keep talking about...

Dear Curves,

I love you.  That's all I can say.  I love you more than words can express.  I don't know if you're effective, I don't know if they ever clean the machines, but what I do know is that I am deeply and madly in love with you.  I love that my workout is planned for me.  I love that I'm not going to run into ultra-obnoxious men going there, I know that nobody is going to judge me if I look stupid using that machine.  I love that there are bulletin boards decorated with colorful paper.  You have won my heart, and hopefully, all of the fat around my midsection. 

I've been working on getting in shape for quite some time, and when I peaked at 230 lbs. a couple of years ago, I knew that something had to change.  

That's a lie.  Complete and total lie.

When I weighed 230, I thought I was the hottest thing that had ever walked the earth.

When I dropped 30 lbs, had to buy new clothes, and realized that I felt cute in a size 16...that was when I knew something had to change.  Did I change?  Well...I did tae-bo for a week.  That was about it.  I lost 10 lbs. that week, and it stayed off.  I kept losing, and kept losing, and wasn't trying hard at all.  I joined a gym, and went because I felt like it.  I dropped to a size 8 for the first time in my life.   Well, back in my comfortable size 12...I think that I shouldn't be just sitting idly by and watching myself get fatter.   So Curves, I have come to you.  Please help me!

You have promised me results.  I can't wait to see them.  Now I just have to get motivated to come visit you.  

Can I get down to a size 6?

I'd like to be back into my baggy 10 by May 1.  That's my goal.  Help me Curves!

Love,

Adrienne

Dear Spoiled Mother of Four,

I don't want to work for you anymore.  I don't like the environment in your home, I don't like the way I'm expected to be the maid, I don't like being bossed around by seven-year-olds, and I don't particularly like the food you make.  I think I'd rather work a 9-5 sitting behind a desk, bored to tears, wanting to rip my eyeballs out from looking at a computer screen for so long, and getting home for dinner on time.  

I used to like you, or so I thought.  Then I discovered that I'd rather not be treated like a maid and a nanny all rolled into one.  You don't pay me enough for that.  Would you like to make it $20/hour? Then I might be on board. 

I've begun applying for jobs at pre-schools in the area.  I think I have a shot, and my dad asked me to get a job where I could smile.  I think there's something to that.  

Please don't be offended, Spoiled Mother of Four, it's nothing personal, I just don't like you anymore.

Sincerely,

Adrienne